all it takes

all it takes when i am alone at night with my curious hands
is to close my eyes to imagine your sweet breath on my skin
or your lips barely touching that spot on the back of my neck
or the weight of body on mine on the midnight grass
or the way your sexy brown eyes meet mine
~ ~ god, i love your eyes, i sigh ~ ~

and i come so easily.

Love At First Light

Love At First Light by Joe Jackson

"But, oh, was it ever so good being bad
like a couple of vampires,
deliciously mad.
Saying this is the best blood
that we've ever had
so we drank it all night.
And if we untangle the webs that we weave
then maybe there's room for more laughter
'cause just for a moment I almost believe
in love at first light."


I'm not a Joe Jackson fan but I adore this song. It captures a moment, a story. It makes me feel something hazy and something sad. I can almost feel the ache in my body; the ache of a morning after, the ache of a night of gin drinking and fucking, the ache of loneliness when you connect with a person you know you'll never see again. Ah, I love songs that make me feel.

Your Day

I remember wishing you well,
many years ago.
I remember how the artificial light
looked against your face,
as we stood in the middle
of that empty mall.
I smiled kindly and held onto the words,
I could not say to you.

Sometimes I wish I could turn back time
so I could be standing there before you,
once again, to smile kindly
and wish you well today
instead of that clumsy message
I just left on your answering machine.

What little I have of you in my life,
my beautiful friend,
I am grateful for.

I wish you a lovely day,
wherever you are ~
I smile kindly in your honor!

Don't Leave

Don't Leave by Ane Brun

Don’t ever leave
That is what you asked of me
do you know what it means
when you plead?

Don’t you ever leave
that is what you said to me
do you know what that can do
to someone like me?

It won’t do us no good
it won’t do us no good

I have no plan to be
anywhere else to but here
or to become someone that leaves
I didn’t even know there was an exit here
darling, don’t you try
to capture me

it won’t do us no good
it won’t do us no good

I am here now
I’m right here by your side
I’ll lay my hand on the couch next to you
you can hold it if you would like to

it will do you good

neglect

you'd think feeling hollow would leave you be, eventually.
you'd think three minutes wouldn't hurt you.
you'd think someone would notice something:
the dullness, the polite smile, the solitude.
something. anything.
the simple things that i long for are neglected.

but do not worry:
this isn't a letter to you.

Winter Wishful Thinking

It's cold and quiet in my city. I imagine yours is too. I don't have much to say at all - I prefer it that way these days. I wish we could do something simple and easy. Escape in a bad movie that makes us laugh for all the wrong reasons as we sit beside one another. Nothing less, nothing more - other than you, me, a bad movie, and a shared blanket. Peaceful, calm, innocent. That's all.

A Letter to Three

Botanical Steps by Delicious Satisfaction, 2007

"Let us be grateful to people who make us happy; they are the charming gardeners who make our souls blossom." ~Marcel Proust


The paths that I have taken, both willingly and unwillingly, have caused me to cross paths with many wonderful people. People I have spoken with for only a few passing moments yet I will always remember, people who I have met in the most peculiar of ways that grew to become family, women I am proud to call a sister, and men that I proud to call a friend. My heart beams when they shine. My heart aches when they hurt. My arms are always open and they know this, whether or not they choose to seek warmth or quiet understanding or distraction in laughter.

Tonight, I wish for many things - above all; peace and understanding, love and relief, happiness and healing - to the one I call my beautiful kitten, to the one I'll always fall for in so many ways, and to the fiercest and most amazing female I know. You are all loved.