16 June 2009


If I were somewhere else, I would wander down familiar streets and hope to run into you so I could feel the embrace of a body that I can't have. I would cry into your shoulder and you would not be able to wipe away my tears. No words exchanged, just quiet breath and tranquility. Maybe the tears would turn into a bittersweet smile. Maybe not.

After many days of arousing ideas and many nights of wet pleasure, I'm in a dark mood. I should feel sexy or mysterious or beautiful in these clothes, but no one seems to pay attention anymore. I allowed him to kill my weak-kneed, dirty little smile mood. I will not receive that apology I always seem to be waiting for.

I can write ten million posts, each creatively stating my desire to fuck you. But tonight, I just need you to hold my hand.

15 June 2009

Dear __________ ,

Every part of me aches, my love. I am sitting at a lonely desk in the library, wishing your tongue was in my mouth and your cock between my legs. Every part of me aches for you. I'm so aggravatingly aroused that it's beginning to make me angry.

I'm pretending to read a book about body language in French. My eyes scan over the same sentence as I twirl a strand of hair between my fingers. I've always wanted to be fucked in a library, I smile to myself. If you were here at this very moment, I would not resist you.

I've been thinking about you a lot these days. I wonder so many things - from the reaction when I look into your eyes after all these years to the size of your cock to if you will find me older, unattractive. I wonder if your eyes would look intimidating and devilish or soft and sincere if you were to look at me while your tongue was between my thighs. I smile again.

I need to be fucked. My fingers can't satisfy me. Even when I imagine you're in the room watching me touch myself, watching me cum, I still feel unfulfilled. I need to be thrown across a table, legs pushed open by your knee, fingers in my hair, tongue on my nipples and shoulders and neck and flesh...fucked. Fucked until I am weak, until my legs quiver, until I feel intoxicated. Fucked like I don't mean a thing to you, even though I know I do. Fucked, raw.